One Year With Braces

April 23, 2016

It's taking me a lot to write out this post. Mainly because it's focusing on one of the main insecurities I've been dealing with for majority of my life. However I've come a long way from then and I feel I should be proud of the actions I've taken to get where I am now. And I know a lot of people are probably dealing with the same kind of insecurity as myself, and there are worse things out there to be insecure about. Fortunately for me my biggest insecurity is cosmetically fixable, it kind of hurt my bank account a bit...or well a lot but I worked hard for my money and saved up everything all by myself. I was shy about a couple hundred dollars so I had to take the shameful and embarrassing route and borrow money from one of my best friends, but rest assured that I paid them back! I have approximately a year and a half left until I get my braces off and granted they make me look like a 12 year old, but a couple years with braces will be well worth a lifetime of close to perfect teeth. 
I distinctly remember the day I got my braces on for the first time. My mouth and teeth were in so much pain and it hurt to eat and even talk! I had such a bad lisp and felt embarrassed every time I talked, and of course this was around the time I was taking a speech class so you can already imagine how that kind of went. I'm still a bit shy to post any before and after pictures just because I'm admittedly afraid of all the "WTF" reactions to how my teeth looked before. I know I make it sound like I had the most disgusting teeth ever but I already know it's not really what people are going to expect, if that makes any sense. To paint a clearer picture, let me just say that I was born without two of my bottom teeth..sooo there's that visual for you guys. 
Whenever I told someone I was planning on getting braces a lot of the responses I would get were, "But you don't even need them," or "but your teeth look fine." However they didn't take a closer look and I am guilty of not fully opening my mouth whenever I talk, which kind of screwed me over through the years because now I jumble all my words together a lot and my articulation is crap. But I guess subconsciously I trained myself to do so because I was aware that if I did that people would notice my teeth more and probably talk about me behind my back...or even to my face, whichever lol. But when I went in for the consultation at the orthodontist's office he told me that "80 percent of his patience ask for braces for cosmetic reasons but 20 percent actually and even medically need braces," and I was apart of that 20%. He didn't sugar coat anything for me and basically implied that I had messed up teeth and that he could help me achieve the smile that I deserve. He told me exactly what I've been needing to hear and finally I found someone I felt like I could trust to help me do so. 
I didn't start to become insecure about my teeth until high school actually. Up until high school I felt that if I just waited long enough that my teeth would gradually just shift into place and the gaps would close up. I was so far from the truth that I'm glad the orthodontist sat my ass back down into reality. It has been such an emotional roller coaster for me this past year because when you're put face-to-face in front of, what you see as your biggest flaw, you don't know how you're supposed to learn how to accept it or if it's even possible to change. However, I want to think that I've been blessed with "flaws" that are very minuscule because  regardless of the fact that I have found things about my appearance that I do no favor entirely, I am overall happy with who I am and I believe I am a hell of a lot more confident in my skin now than I was five years ago. 
♡♡♡♡♡

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